Monday, September 21, 2009

SEAT S4 Chapter 5

A-Day +2
Everest Day 1
16  Sept 09

Deepak showed up. That’s a good start. Then he got in a fight with a taxi driver!

The three of us boarded a small airplane bound for Lukla – a mountain town in the Himalaya range. I’m still amazed we even landed at Lukla. The entire length of the runway is 400m and it’s attached to the side of a mountain. On a slope.

You can’t even park a buss in 400m, let alone land a plane!!

It was fresh. The sun hadn’t yet breached the surrounding hills. It was almost frosty. A sort of blue glow covered the village. We hustled into the village centre and met three Nepali men who were our prospective porters. One lad, aged 20, named Haka, spoke very little English, got the job! The team was set.

Haka set the pace, smile intact, backs in tow. Five minutes into the walk and into the fog, we got a taste of how life with Deepak was going to be. When I tell you that he is the type of person that knows everyone, you truly have no idea what ‘everyone’ means. We round a corner and he bumps into someone he knew. While they banter away in Nepali, the English tourist who looks as though he was about to have a heart attack proceeds to tell us how terribly hard his journey has been. He almost home, the final few yards until he reached Lukla. Surely he wasn’t Super Extreme Enough for Nepal.

Our first day was coveted in the lush greens of the Himalaya. Something we should be sure to miss in the coming days I’m sure.

We got our first taste of life up here as we passed through small villages with colorful houses, school kids on their way home, and locals going about their business in their fields.

Our stop for the night was Phakding a tiny village with, of course, great views.

An acclimatization walk to a school perched on a hilltop, accompanied by a Spanish Señorita (Silvia) we had befriended, and a plate of momo later we turned in for the night, at 645pm, in a cold, intimate wood cabin…


A-Day +3
Everest Day 2
17  Sept 09

Today was the day that Deepak had told us was the hardest. I’m not sure whether to believe him or not? Was he going to say that every day? Or was he being serious? If this day was hard for a Guide and a Porter – then we were screwed.

Silvia, who was heading on roughly the same path as us, was already long gone by the time we dragged ourselves out of bed.

We left the kind hospitality of our hosts at Phakding and headed…up. Eight hours of up.

It was beautiful, no question, but it was hard to take it all in when you’re constantly out of breath.

It was about half way up a hill that I discovered a problem with this region of the world. You get so tired walking, so you stop to rest a while. Problem is, the moment you stop, you just feel more and more motivated to go on. Which makes you more tired..and so on. But we were rewarded. We caught our first view of the Himalayan peaks today, and with clear blue skies, the warm sun, the waterfall running behind us; what a view it was! But then we were un-rewarded. Around the corner, Deepak showed us where we were going by basically pointing into the clouds. With a harder look, we could just make out the tiny houses that were scattered on the hillside. Namche Bazar. 3440m. Up.

Being greeted by the young school kids was a lovely touch. They all wanted their picture taken, they all wanted to know what was going on, there wasn’t a shy bone between them! The welcome feeling quickly faded as our attention was drawn to poster after poster of people who went missing in the region…

We climbed the elevetly-billion stairs to our hotel and again were greeted with that overly kind Nepali hospitality. And they all thought I looked like ‘Nekiel’, a famous Nepali movie star. So I milked it for the remainder of my time in Nepal.

A-Day +4
Everest Day 3
18  Sept 09

At this altitude, the weather changes so quickly, we’d have had all four seasons by the time you read this sentence! The view out the window of the hotel diner was perfect weather, clear blue skies and a slight breeze. I had breakfast, and the weather had turned to shit. Thick fog had rolled into the U-shaped basin of the village and made it impossible to see more than 20 meters.

We were to spend another night here in Namche after spending today walking up and down some Himalayas to acclimatize. I was hoping tonight may be a bit more peaceful than last night – the locals had chained up about 20 yak’s outside our window, all with cow-bells around their neck, and because they were all one one single long rope, when one moved, they all moved. It was initially quite a pleasant sound.  Eventually it was annoying - like a Yak-chime, all night long.

Namche, I was told, is a fairly new village, which evolved pretty much for the tourists. Even so,  there’s still some amazing Nepali ways of life going on up here. In the middle of the village was a new building site, with boulders lined up ready to be stacked into a house. James and I together couldn’t even move one, and admittedly we felt pretty useless when a local came bounding around the corner with five or six on his back.

We set out on our day walk and headed, up, of course. Up into the cloud. About now is where Deepak decided to tell us all the horror stories about the airports up here, including planes crashing at Lukla. Thanks Deepak. I was fascinated by the little Himalayan flowers up here and kept stopping every few steps to take photos. James and Deepak disappeared into the fog leaving Haka and I to our ask-in-English-answer-in-Nepali conversations.

Around lunch time we arrived at the school Sir Edmund Hilary founded in Khumjung. The people here love him. We had lunch with a couple of locals here. This consisted of potatoes. And butter.

Now is a good time to tell you that up here, poo is gold. Its used for everything. Building, cooking, growing… you name it, poo can do it. So these potatoes we were eating.. yup, you guessed it. Everything that went down the toilet (which was little more than a hole in the ground) was used as compost to grow these little gems. Yummmy!

We returned to Namche after using most of the day on this walk, and rested up for the walk tomorrow with conversation and game of cards over dinner with Silvia and a handful of other travelers we met.

Consider us acclimatized.

A-Day +5
Everest Day 4
19  Sept 09

Now this was more like it.

A frosty morning, kept us cool as we trekked over the mountains above Namche. From the cliff edge road we could see…well.. fog. But that changed as the day warmed up. The sun burnt off all the fog revealing the valley below us and the mountains in the distance that we were heading for. We saw our first signs of AMS here as well. Large billboards with warnings about altitude sickness.

From there we started heading down, strangely. Across rivers, over bridges, as the green-ness that was once all around us started to ease up and give way to the grey rock underneath. But after lunch, which was a Deepak special – packet noodles which of which he was very proud to have ‘cooked’ himself, we started to climb again. The incline itself wouldn’t have been all that hard either, but for the amount of steps that lay ahead. I didn’t count them – I’m not even sure I would be able to count that high. Watching Haka run up the hill, finding all the little short cuts, and the ease at which he did so with all of our gear on his back made me feel useless. However, that was all about to change.

As we finally reach the summit of stairs, and passed though a gate of prayer wheels into the tiny village of Tengboche we were rewarded, if only for a moment, by the Gods of the mountains.

It had been another eight hour day of walking and we were pretty tired. We were sweaty. We hadn’t showered in four days. We hadn’t had amazing views for a lot of today given we were walking through low forests after fog coated valleys. But here, where the clouds were dark and threatening, as we passed through the prayer wheels (which you spin for good luck, by the way), Deepak was hurrying us over.

“Quickly!” her shouted, and pointed towards the sky.

And there, right there, in the cloud filled sky, was a hole just the right size to see the mountain it was revealing.

Everest.

I couldn’t believe it! There she was, within sight! After the last two days,  especially, I felt this was the biggest motivator we had been given yet. It’s as if Mother Nature was egging us on.

I barely had time to pull my camera out and snap a photo before, just like in Namche, the clouds rolled back in within minutes, and Everest faded out of site.



Tengboche is also home to a monastery. The monks had just finished three weeks of worship being locked within the grounds of the monastery, which again, was perfect timing for us. They let us it and showed us around their playground. Most of the monks were celebrating their release by sitting around playing card games.



A cup of chai later and we began to walk our final stretch of the day. Onwards to Pangboche accompanied by one of the monastery’s wild dogs. That was a lovely touch!

Shortly after we arrived here was the first time I started to feel weird. I had a headache, felt a little light headed and lost my appetite. Even for momo. Deepak said this was normal (worryingly!) and ordered me a cup of ginger tea. Then it was straight to bed as far as I was concerned, and given how cold it was – I didn’t even bother taking my clothes off.

A-Day +6
Everest Day 5
20  Sept 09

 I think it was about six am when Deepak started banging on our door.

“Wake up, it’s a beautiful day! You’ll love this view!”

A beautiful day? It was shithouse yesterday… oh wait, lets not forget we’re in the Himalaya where the weather is changes every two minutes.

James stayed in bed. I didn’t. I didn’t get out of the sleeping bag either. I sort of bounced out the door, rubbed my eyes and looked towards the skyline.

I think I turned and started pulling James out of bed.

“Holy shit man, get up before the weather changes and you miss this!”

Yesterday we had arrived in cloudy, close to nightfall conditions. This morning was crisp, clear blue skies. Albeit a bit nippy, but we were 3939m, and surrounded by mountains. Everywhere we looked we could see snow capped Himalayas. It was tremendously beautiful.

The walk to Pheriche was rather pleasant as well. There wasn’t much of an incline – 3930m to 4270m. Wildlife was everywhere, the sun was shining.

Pheriche was the largest town we’d seen for two days since we left Namche. The tundra had noticeably changed by now. Bare rock and low brown grass was all we had to admire.

Deepak insisted on another acclimatization walk. To 4500. Of course that doesn’t sound very high to you sitting at home reading this, but every step from here on, every breath, every move your body makes, is starved of oxygen.

On the crest of the mountain overlooking Pheriche, which looked like a toy village from up here, we made what Deepak described as a good luck charm. A cone shaped pile of rocks called ??????????????

Took some photos and played a game of cards at  4500m to give our bodies time to adjust.



At dinner, Silvia has asked if she could join our group, officially. I guess she wanted the safety of travelling in a group incase something did go wrong. We welcomed her on board to our team of now five.



That night, was the first night I found it slightly harder to sleep with lower levels of oxygen.

A-Day +7
Everest Day 6
21  Sept 09

We woke and it was cold. The clouds had already rolled in. Today we were to push on to ????m to Lobuche.

The first couple of hours of walking were easy. Enjoyable. Flat open plains surrounded by mountains, a slow-flowing glacial river, fresh air. Once we started walking we didn’t feel the cold at all.

Then it got hard. The incline started and soon after it was harder to breathe. Deepak got us to rest on the hillside as he massaged our heads to keep the blood flowing. Haka played a game of ‘find heaviest rock I can lift.’ Bastard!

It wasn’t even that far to our lunch stop in Duglha, but it was damn hard work. In Duglha Deepak showed me a photo of Nikel. I don’t think I looked anything like him, but whatever! I started to feel a bit weird here, lost my appetite a bit.

We pushed on, and the incline increased. Every 15mins or so I’d have to stop and catch my breath. The pace was slow. We finally made it to the top of todays big hill where a grave yard of rock piles lay as respect to those who had lost their lives on the mountains. There were so many of them, so, so many of them!

Past this, the tundra really changed. Grass started to give way and the cold really picked up. It was like an Arctic Desert. It was absolutely quiet. Absolutely beautiful. Even though it was relatively flat, it still felt like hard work. My headache started to get worse. I was hoping to hell that it wasn’t AMS.

By the time we got to Lobuche it was killing me. Aspirin did nothing.

We had another acclimatization walk, just up the hill and back. I cannot tell you how cold it was when we eventually go to the ‘village hill.’ It was raining only a little, but the wind chill was intense! We took a few photos of all of us up there at 4500m and got the fuck back down!

Deepak gave me another massage which seemed to help for a while. I ate dinner and went to bed, hoping I’d survive the night..

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

SEAT S4 Chapter 4

Saturday, 12 September 2009
Airports.

They say the average person spends a total of seven years waiting in their lifetime. Waiting for a bus, waiting for a phone call… just waiting. I’m sure I’ve already spent my seven.
They’re all the same. Confusing layouts, shops never open when you need them to be, and when you’ve been awake for 27 hours, the airport just gets worse. Coffee doesn’t do anything to keep you awake at this stage. It just tastes really bad.

The idea of air travel is great until you actually reach an airport. Aside from getting close to completely undressed just to be able to pass through customs without setting the metal detector off, you are then faced with hours of more waiting in a large steel tube as it flies through the air.
Speaking of time, I have concluded that Time Magazine is the choice of travellers and adventurers alike. Its pages are thinner than that of say, GQ, it’s easily rolled and folded into whatever size cravass you are left with in your backpack and it’s a half decent read to boot.
So my hours have begun.
It’s not going to make life any easier that my personal in flight entertainment screen has crashed, either!

This morning I woke to find an email from Mr Newell saying plans had come apart again. He was supposed to meet me in Nepal, arrive a few days earlier even, but the email told a different story.
He was still in Delhi, and being told all flights were grounded due to a pilot strike. Yes, well the last thing I want my pilot to be is an unhappy one! In 12 hours I will see if Gentleman James has charmed his way out of this one, or if I, Solo Sammy will be left to my own vices…


Sunday, 13 September 2009
The Journey Begins
Arrival Day.

I am met at Kathmandu airport by a rather hairy bloke. James.
It’s humid. It’s hot. There’s no sense of order. “Make an orderly line for the health desk” gives way to crowd around, push and yell until the health desk officer notices you. Or just walk right past.
James had befriended a taxi driver / travel agent / hotel finder while he was waiting for me, and following a hair raising drive into the centre of Kathmandu, (Thamel), we were settled. $5 a night. Everything in here, Hotel Tasi Dhargey, appears to be in order at first glance.
You can’t even thinking about using the tap water for anything. I have yet to test my stomach’s resistance to the food. Nearly 36 hours of travel tends to help you loose your appetite.

So first impressions then?
It’s loud. IT’s colorful and it takes balls of steel to want to drive here, although I suspect India will be worse. I think the entirety of the driving rules are:
Just go, make sure you beep a lot and don’t stop for anything.’
That night, however the sound of the city gave way to  complete silence.
How can this tiny city with it’s unpaved roads, no driving rules and endless shop fronts be so much louder than a city the size of Sydney, then by contrast, so much quieter at night.
The biggest problem so far is that my pillow is akin to a brick.


Monday, 14 September 2009 
Arrival Day +1

We’ve decided to climb Everest.
Just to base camp anyway. In a few days we should be well on our way to the rooftop of the world.
After only just one day exploring Thamel, I can already tell I don’t want to spend too much time here.  It does get a bit old being asked for money every two minutes, but it comes with the territory I guess.
The tea here is truly amazing. It’s incredibly tasty. I will have to find out what its made with. Yak milk, I suspect.
Found time to check out the Monkey Temple via rickshaw ride as well. Not too many monkeys but the ones that were hanging around were very funny.
James has the runs. He’s been eight times in the last two hours. I’m laughing now but I know I’ll be there at least once on this trip.
I’ve been told of a place called Nagakot. Sunrise and sunset provides a view of 42 out of 50 Himalayan peaks. Sounds like a place I need to get to.

I must admit I feel like bad. And old Nepali man (obviously chasing money as they all seem to be) drew a picture of me even after I told him I had no money for him, yet he gave me the drawing anyway. I looked for him when I passed back through Durbar Square when I had some change for him – but no luck.

We keep hearing the same stories from the locals about how there haven’t been any tourists in recent times and they are finding it hard to make a living. Not sure wether to believe this or not. They also don’t like the Chinese very much here in Nepal.
Nepali kids are terribly cute. It’s a shame they are sent out to beg for money. We rang into a small group of children in a back alley, one of them insisted he show us a magic trick – so he threw a firecracker on the ground next to James. A good laugh for me, a good fright for James.

Kumar, the man who owns the hotel we are staying at, just so happens to own a travel agency as well! We’ve been in talks with him about Everest Base Camp trek. We’ll see how that progresses. I didn’t think for a moment before I got here that we would walk Everest. But its there. It’s calling…

I can’t wait to get out there and see the real Nepal.


Tuesday, 15 September 2009
A-Day +2

I took a shit when I got up this morning. I fear this is the beginning of the end.
I woke early to try and get a shot of sunrise over Thamel from the roof of the hotel. No go. Low cloud. Welcome to Nepal! Looks like rain today. (it didn’t rain)
James woke, emptied his stomach for the 9th time in 24 hours and we were good to go.

Surprise, surprise who should turn up at breakfast but Kumar. I think the hotel staff call him to let him know when we are awake and having breakfast in the hotel. Sneaky fuckers!
He does appear very genuine to me but I’m not rushing into any decisions. We checked out a few more travel places and went back to haggle Kumar later on.
Remember my mention of Nagakot? I managed to swindle us into what appears to be an excellent deal. 12 days Everest trek, two days in Nagakot for free. I wonder if I can convince James to stretch his budget to a mountain flight as well…

I guess today is the unofficial Day One of the Everest Trek. We decided to go for it.
We were introduced to our guide, Deepak. Seems like a great guy – we had some laughs then he told us he had just come back from bringing a tourist down from Everest who had AMS (Altitude sickness).
I hope to hell I don’t end up with it. I want to be able to say I made it there and back. Also sounds like Deepak is in high demand. He’s had to turn away many tourists saying to them that he doesn’t start trekking until November, but had made an exception for us for some reason!
4:30am wake up call. 6am flight to Lukla – the adventure really picks up tomorrow.

Friday, August 28, 2009

SEAT S4 Chapter 3

Friday 28 August
14 Days until departure.


We’re almost down to single digits now. 14 days to go. 
If I'm honest, I was getting a wee bit worried about James. I hadn't heard from him in almost three weeks. I knew he was heading into Taliban controlled Pakistan. 
Sporting a British passport, it spells nothing but trouble should we ever cross paths with Osama's buddies. Especially in their own back yard! But late last night I got that familiar sound of an instant chat message and sure enough there he was on my computer again. He had survived and was watching the sunset from his $4 a night hotel room, eating a $1.50 curry. Best he'd had as well, he says. Looking at the photo he sent me of the view, looked like Pakistan heaven to me. 

My so called 'training' for the Himalayan region has fallen by the wayside and in its place have been David Attenbrough, Jeff Corwin and Michael Palin DVDs. Bathing Asian elephants, escaping one horned Rhino's, flights over the mountain tops on crystal clear days, endless photo opportunities, trying to avoid being electrocuted while riding on the roof of an Indian Express Train - all the things I have to look forward to sinking my boots into, and if I'm honest for the second time, I'm growing rather impatient. 

I'm over Sydney traffic. I want to see cows on the road, not cattle trucks full of them. I don't want to be stuck in traffic jams unless I'm riding my elephant to work. I'm over Sydney's weather. It's just 'nice', it's not a monsooning thunderstorm. I'm over the grey hum of the city - I'd gladly trade the skyline of skyscrapers right now for the sky scraping mountains of Nepal. Even Megan Fox has given way to a photo of sunrise over Mt. Everest on my desktop. 

Two weeks. 

The old knee injury has been playing up recently. For those that don't know, I wrecked my knee playing soccer when I was about 16 and had to learn to walk again on my left leg. Not pleasant. Occasionally she flares up again but nothing too serious. All I'm hoping is that it will hold together in the wild terrain of the third world. Guess there's only one way to find out; nothing short of diving right in. 'Spose I could always take a breather and talk awhile with those cheeky Makak's. 

So I'm here in 'nice' old grey Sydney, getting impatient, feeling excited, not training, working hard at trying to keep my mind on work instead of the Himalayas it keeps wondering off to. 
Two weeks. Two long, restless weeks to go before I'm breathing in some fresh mountain air. Or the smell of yak. 
I've always said that the world is my playground and at the moment I'm feeling like a child locked inside the house on a beautiful day. Let me out, damn you, there's a whole other world waiting there for me!

Chris is now back from Africa, and although he won't admit it, I'm sure he's a little jealous he's not coming with us. Never mind, mate. We'll find an old Rhino to replace you. 
His words of advice? "Don't take more than 100 photos because I don't want to sit through a lengthy slide show when you get back." I'm sure what that means in South African is "Have an awesome trip my friend, I sure do wish I was coming with you guys. Can't wait to see the thousands of photos you'll take. Be safe." 

Monday, July 27, 2009

SEAT S4 Chapter 2

Monday 27 July 
47 Days until departure. 

I love putting on my shiny black dress shoes. It's a jazzy feeling. It means tonight there's a night on the town. Fast women and expensive cocktails, classy bars with hard to pronounce names, No one will be home before sunrise and some of us won't make it home at all. Dinner will be bought from whatever kerb-side food stall we can find and we will most likely regret everything the next day. 
I only have one other pair of shoes that tops this feeling. My mountain Boots. 
THEY, feel adventurous. They feel sound. They have a feeling like there is something grand on the horizon. That I'm about to embark on a journey with no known outcome. As you well know by now - I crave that feeling. The world is out there waiting, and these boots will get me into the thick of it. 

Along with these boots, my bulging backpack of clothes, camera gear, water bottles, and passports has been sitting at the ready beside my bed, ready to take on Nepal. I packed for this trip months ago. That’s how excited I've been. I have recently had to come to the realization that I may have to remove the clothes from the backpack to make room for more camera gear. Who needs clothes anyway! It's 34 degrees over there! 

Its been a few weeks since James left, but recently he popped up on my Gmail chat window so I was able to get some of the inside info. 
me:Where are you? 
James:Singapore airport! 
It looks like every other airport on earth - they're so crap 
me: so they let you in? Given you're passport and all.. 
James: going through customs in Macau 
they look at my passport: 
"is this wet?" 
I'm like "yeah, 18 months ago" 
Then she starts pulling off the sides! 
"This is breaking" 
I say "it's the passports last trip" 
She laughs - I get through 
Then @ China, they made a fuss. Had to go see some supervisor. Let me in eventually. 
seven more to go.... 

It appears that James' boyish charm has got him through the first set of checkpoints. I'm hoping he can keep that charm going for the next few months or else I will have a very lonely journey. It did not however, help him save his pants from some low life thief. So while James has been running around in the Chinese monsoon with no pants on, I've been planning on getting needle after needle stuck into my arm, but as always, things didn't go so much to plan. 

I must say, the doctor was blasé about the whole thing. I turned up with a mile long list of various disease I required immunity for, only for the Doctor to laugh and say " no no no, you only need these two. Don't listen to those guide books! And look, if you come back next week I'll even give you one of them for free." 
Now, I'm always a fan of free stuff. Free food, free rides, free love, but free immunization? Hmm. I'm a little skeptical. But hey - this ain't the girl scouts - this is Super Extreme Adventure Team. I'll take his advice and hope for the best. How bad can Rabies be, anyway! 

So everything has fallen off track as per usual, which, as far as S.E.A.T is concerned means we're right on track . James may still running around with no pants on, Chris may still be in a predicament about which South African city to visit next based purely on whether or not he's feeling like a redhead, brunette or blonde, and I may be enjoying Rabies, but this is still feeling like a great start to Season 4. 

Sunday, July 12, 2009

SEAT S4 Chapter 1

Sunday July 12 2009 
61 Days until departure. 

I don't quite know what to expect. 

Everyone says it’s going to be hard, that if the altitude doesn't get me, the cold will. Or the food. Or I'll be shot and kidnapped by the rebels. But I'm not quite sure if they are over exaggerating or I'm just naive. After all, it's currently 34 degrees in Nepal, I've been eating curry for as long as I remember, and I've been to a cold place before. How hard can it be! This is Super Extreme Adventure Team! We own hard. 

OK, in all honesty, I KNOW it's going to be hard. Probably ridiculously hard. But that’s half the challenge. What fun would it be if I just caught a lift up the side of a Himalaya instead of pushing ourselves to our limits to see just how high we can actually go before we pass out and freeze to death! I also know, despite all the so called 'training' we've been doing for this trip - our systems will be bent, broken, battered and bruised and thrown over their limits, in a place where the vaccinations endured before setting off cost almost as much as the flights. 

Truthfully I know it’s just excitement taking over in place of naivety. I'm fidgety and restless, I want to be somewhere remote and hostile. In 60 days - I will be. 

James and his flakey passport leave tomorrow. 
Sydney - Adelaide - Perth - China - Pakistan - India - Nepal - India - Sydney. 
A little more impressive than my Sydney - Hong Kong - Nepal - India - Hong Kong - Sydney, and a lot more hostile. China has riots, Pakistan has the Taliban, Nepal has political unrest, it seems India is the safest place either of us will visit, unless we get adventurous with the food. Which we won't. 

I'm half expecting to land in Kathmandu waiting for a James that never shows up. Let's hope that’s not the case. I'm going to need someone to get into trouble with. 
I have no idea how we're getting from Kathmandu to New Delhi, but I like that. I enjoy not knowing. Anything could happen and I could be stuck there for weeks, maybe months, living off boiled blood and sheep testicles. I could be flying into this amazing part of the world only to get acute mountain sickness and spend 34 days in agony! (At 12,000 meters, the average person only has 9-15 seconds of consciousness, and it's not much better at 6000 meters; 5-12 minutes.) The unknown is intriguing. I don't WANT to know how I'm getting from one place to another. I don't WANT to know all the problems I'm going to face. I WANT to be there, in the thick of it. 
The biggest problem I have yet to solve is how I’m getting all my camera gear in my backpack. Bah, raincoats and thermals, who needs ‘em! This is the place wide angle lenses were invented for. This is the first time I’m going properly travelling as a proper photographer. This is going to be fantastic. 

60 days. It can't go fast enough. James, the prick, is already on route to Super Extreme Adventure Team Season 4. 

Perhaps I should login to Facebook via iPhone, in 60 days time and set the only status that's possibly ever been worth reading. 
"Sammy is at the highest place in the world, with camera, without James, and has 9 seconds of consciousness left." 

Chris, on the other hand, is still in South Africa. Drunk, I’d imagine and in bed with someone who has no idea what she’s gotten herself into…